Backpaddling, as it were, to the Netherlands

So while I have lots of fun and juicy stuff about my American trip to write about, I still have to post my memories of my first visit to Amsterdam, which has earned a place on my Top Ten list of Curtis's Favorite European Cities, before I forget 'em all! So here goes!

DAY ONE: Paul and I depart for Amsterdam on September 1. Sadly for me, the flight departs from Prague at a VERY unpleasant 7:00 a.m., which means that I have to make it up to Ruyzne by 5:45. I hoof it there without coffee or a shower...needless to say, I am NOT a happy camper, particularly when they announced that the flight was delayed for 20 minutes! One way or another, however, we arrive in Amsterdam safe and sound. I require my caffeine injection within minutes of stepping off the plane, but by then, all was well. Our hotel turns out to be a bit of a trek from the train station. In fact, we have to take a ferryboat across a canal and walk roughly a mile to get there.

Spend the late morning/early afternoon exploring the incredible city; of course, this means strolling along picturesque canals and what not. I'm disappointed to see the tower of the famous Westerkerk (as referenced in The Diary of Anne Frank) under heavy scaffolding for the season; however, we get to visit the famous Homomonument which, although it's a bit overrated, is still pretty damn cool. We eat lunch at a local cafe. I indulge in savory mushroom pancakes. This will be my sole sampling of Dutch cuisine the entire weekend! The late afternoon/early evening is spent at the Van Gogh Museum; while I like "Sunflowers" and "Irises," I discover I'm not such a big fan of his lesser-known works. It's a bit monotonous. We have dinner and drinks at the Amsterdam branch of the famous London noodle house Wagamama, I have a Thai chicken dish which is superb!

DAY TWO: We enjoy a breakfast of bagels and coffee at the train station...the only thing less-than-enjoyable about this arrangement is the stench of stale urine from the spot where we're forced to stand across the street. Paul takes me to a variety of retail outlets, I buy an olive oil-based hand cream and tourist guide. Lunch was grabbed at the local supermarket...a bagel with lox (yum) for me and a chicken fajita sandwich for Paul. I insist on strolling down the Reguliergracht, which Lonely Planet rates as the most beautiful of Amsterdam's canals given the seven hump bridges that line its banks. I can't say that I disagree!

Dinner was Indonesian at a bustling restaurant near the city center, which is fantastic (like a milder version of Indian) albeit considerably more expensive than I had intended. At least it was something different than you can have here in Prague, which makes it all the more worth the added expense! We take the evening to explore some of Amsterdam's gay neighborhood, which is pretty fantastic. First stop: Montmatre, which is basically a tiny neighborhood gay bar that played lots of fantastic tunes. Second stop: SoHo, which is one of the more unusual bars I've ever seen. Imagine the dining room on the Titanic with disco balls, flirty bartenders and thumping techno music. We retreat to the hotel around 1 a.m.

DAY THREE: Our final day of Dutch sightseeing, given that we're devoting the final day to the Madonna concert! Paul has to get some work done, so I head into the city solo. My first venture is a canal boat cruise, which is a deal at 6 Euro/hour. The journey is interesting, save for some obnoxiously loud Italian tourists who are sitting in front of me and who wind up spilling Coca-Cola all over themselves during the tour. I also take the early afternoon to explore the (in)famous Red Light District. It's not at all what I expected - it's like walking down a shopping street with women instead of mannequins in the shop windows, which are lit up with red lights. Many of them are not in the traditional "Playboy bunny" mode that one expects. You can find heavy-set women and many on the much-older side. I got to observe several transactions taking place...a man simply approaches the shop door, a curtain is pulled...and then...well, we'll have to use our imaginations.

I meet Paul at 3:30 at a furniture store nearby. We then head to the Anne Frank Huis, the last on my must-see museum list for Amsterdam. It's unsettling, naturally, and a lot more poignant than I expected. You see the revolving bookcase which hid the entrance to the Secret Annexe and Anne's film-star postcard collection as referenced in the diary itself. By the time you reach the diary, which sits in a glass case in the final room of the museum, it's impossible not to have a lump in your throat.

Dinner is, again, Asian cuisine; I sample a green curry which is quite delicious, albeit a bit on the messy side. Paul retreats to the hotel a bit early after we finish, I insist on staying in the city to take more pictures by night. I finally manage to capture the so-called Magere Brug, or "Skinny Bridge," which is stunning when lit up at night.

DAY FOUR: Finally, it's September 4, the day of our audience with Her Madge-sty! We finish up our sightseeing in town before having Greek for lunch and heading to Amsterdam Arena at 3:00 p.m. There's already a gaggle of fans sporting '80s duds and cowboy hats outside the arena...a few are wearing the H&M tracksuit that Madge recently hawked in their fall ad campaign. The Dutch certainly go all-out for Madonna...we pass a concession stand serving up "Like a Virgin" and "Like a Prayer" pastas! The doors finally open a little before 5:30 p.m. There's some confusion with the correct gate where we're supposed to enter, which unfortunately delays us a bit. We rush the stage and manage to get in front of the soundboard, but still not as close as I'd hoped. There's a forgettable opening act by British DJ Paul Oakenfold.

Ever the diva, Madonna doesn't actually hit the stage until 9:15 or so, but she does not disappoint! She descends onto the stage via an enormous disco ball, with a rock-star quality rivalled only by the Mick Jaggers and Chers of the world, and proceeds to belt and hoof it through two hours of old and modern tunes, with seven costume changes along the way. Her voice has certainly improved over the years. There's no telling as to whether or not she's had work done, but she's in amazing shape and still a babe at 48. True to form, she seems to favor the modern stuff (no "Vogue" or "Like a Prayer" in the set list, sadly), but she certainly makes my day by throwing in "Like a Virgin," "Live to Tell," "La Isla Bonita" and "Lucky Star." Even though we're relatively close to the stage, a sea of heads makes it difficult to see the stage at times. I hope they air the show on TV or release a DVD at some point! The show ends - SANS ENCORE, I WAS FLABBERGASTED - and then we make a beeline for the metro. Our dinner consists of pommes frites with curry sauce.

Observations, realizations and confessions

So I've just returned to Europe from my first trip back to the United States since my departure exactly a year ago. Time certainly flies when you're having fun, as cliche as it sounds. I spent the first four days of my return with friends in Manhattan and then headed up to Connecticut for, essentially, one family event after another. The week is a blur. I am, however, looking forward to getting back to work and routine...

As is usually the case in these situations, I didn't get to see everyone I'd hoped and planned to see...and I didn't really get adequate time to catch up with those friends and family members who I *did* have the fortunate opportunity to see. So, for those of you who I did visit, THANKS-A-MILLION for coming out! And, for those of you who I didn't get to see, I'm really sorry and YOU HAVE MY WORD that you'll be on my short list for the next visit!

So, in my semi-delirious jetlagged state, I began a thorough self-evaluation about the past year...I don't want to get all "pompous, condescending American ex-pat" on you, because there's nothing I hate more than pompous, condescending American ex-pats. I mean, really, we all know you've realized how big the world is, how you've found yourself, how liberal everyone is outside of the U.S.A., and how much you've changed for the better and all that. Personally, I like to think ALL life experiences, foreign and domestic, change people in some way...and not necessarily for the better!

Anyways, here's my list of observations, realizations and confessions:

1. You can take a boy out of capitalism, but you can't take capitalism out of the boy. Yes, I can shamelessly admit that I REALLY miss Target, Dunkin' Donuts, Barnes & Noble and discount shops in the vein of Century 21 and Burlington Coat Factory. Fortunately, I got my dose of all of these in the past week.

2. I also miss: hot sauce, Diet Dr. Pepper, fresh guacomole, free refills, free tap water at restaurants, drinks served with crushed ice...and of course HALLOWEEN! I'm hoping some American pal puts together a party like last year.

3. An observation: most Americans know NOTHING about Prague or the Czech Republic...I swear many relatives and friends think I'm living in a grass hut on the outskirts of Cambodia.

Among the questions people asked me this past week:

"So where is Prague exactly?"

"Wait...isn't that in Czechoslovakia? What's the Czech Republic?"

"Do people celebrate Christmas there?"

"Do people drive cars there?"

"Do they have Wal-Mart there?"

"How do you do your laundry there?"

"Do they speak German there?"

(The list goes on and on, but those are my favorites).

4. On the same note: most Americans know little-to-nothing about European history. Yes, I include myself in this category...although I feel like I've learned a bit since being here and it's becoming a passion of mine, I've still only scratched the surface. One friend wasn't sure if W.A. Mozart was living or dead. Yes, you read correctly.

5. Out of all of my various experiences in the past year, most friends and family seemed most interested in two things: how airport security for trans-Atlantic flights been increased since the London incident last month, and "The Sound of Music" tour. I certainly was willing to dish about the second part...yes, I made my Julie Andrews pilgrimage to Salzburg in early May. Yes, I paid 30 Euro for the official tour. Yes, I danced around the "Do-Re-Mi" fountain and under the ivy trellises; yes, I saw Leisl's "Sixteen Going on Seventeen" gazebo; yes, I spun around in a daisy-filled alpine field, screeching "The hills are ALIVE..." in a voice to wake the dead. Would you expect anything less from me?

6. MOST IMPORTANTLY, I realized that, yes, I definitely intend to return to the United States at some point. Although I absolutely love Prague and Europe, and I've had some fantastic experiences, I really do miss my friends and family!